When I was ugly

Hey all,
how are you? Hope everything’s fine 🙂
It took me a while to decide to post this topic or not. It’s something personal and touchy subject. These days in my area a 16 years old girl disappeared from home. She left back a message saying:

There’s time until tonight and that’s all. No, this thing makes sense, I did not drink or anything. Anyway, tomorrow you will see the changes.

They started searching her. Her parents contacted all medias and left messages asking for help. Obviously they desperately asked her to come back home…but nothing. After one week they stopped searching for her, that’s what the law says. On Tuesday morning, of last week, I was reading newspapers before starting working and was so disgusted. The parents of the poor girl were saying how scared they were. Many idiots called them giving out false information but many other idiots where threatening them. Yes, you heard me..seriously…people are sick.

Lunch break of same day. I was checking latest news again and..unfortunately, on top of everything there was the news that they found her..but sadly they found her dead. Now the policy is continuing with the investigation but they think it is probably suicide. It seems the poor girl was a victim of bullying at school.

When I was young, in secondary school I used to be a victim too. My classmates used to tell me how ugly I was “you’re ugly, you’re an animal (with the meaning of ugly)”. They kept doing these stupid beauty charts and..I was last obviously. You guys can’t imagine how much I hated it. I still hate it, it’s something that signs you. For a long time I kept feeling insecure. I kept telling to myself “I’m ugly” because they told me that I was ugly..so it’s true, I really am.
What else was my problem? I’m shy. Now I’m a bit more secure but in past I used to be really shy. Well, to be honest when I was a kid I was secure, but in secondary school these guys made me feel like crap and my insecurity grew up so much.

For a long time I thought I was the problem…but then, I don’t know how I realized I’m not, they’re the problem. I know I was lucky, mine lasted only three years and can’t really be compared to other situations when victims are targeted and made fun of, criticized because of their look, criticized because they’re shy and don’t want to talk.  People don’t realize that if I stay quite on my own doesn’t mean I’ve nothing to say, I simply have nothing to say to you. When I want to say something, when I want to talk I do it with people I like and feel comfortable talking to. On the worst of situations, victims get hurt physically…

Mine was just offensive and I’m 1000% sure my classmates didn’t even realize how much it hurt me. But, as I said, I’m lucky. Thanks to my family, my friends and also to the way I am, I overcame everything. I don’t give up easily and I don’t let anyone put me down. Never allow people like these to put you down. Never!

I know this is really a delicate subject and it’s so sad to see it growing more and more instead of simply disappearing. It is fueled even more with the spread of social media . It’s really sad.

If you’re a victim of bullying I’ve to say, stop thinking you are the problem because you’re not. It’s not you, it’s them. If the things get serious and you don’t know how to handle them, ask for help.Your life is way to precious to allow some random stupid kid ruin it.

Kisses,
Armida

Una risposta a “When I was ugly

  1. it’s very very sad, that this girl was found in Arno and she decided to suicide herself for bullying :/ children are cruel, for them bullying is like a joke, a game, but it is definetely not for the person who is bullyfied. I am very sorry for her :/

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